Bootcamp + Big Shoes=can't BEND over

So I recently started bootcamp (about 3 weeks ago) which I decided was a good way to combat all the holiday treats & sweets lurking in the staff room.  It sounded like a great idea to get in shape and start eating healthy and really take charge of my life.  Little did I know the first week, bootcamp was going to take charge of me.  After the first work out I had no control over my body.  I was unable to sit (at all), stand comfortably, or move at a remotely normal pace.  The first week I looked like an old person, feebly hobbling around in search of my cane. I felt like the mayor from Hornton Hears a Who, after he went to the dentist and got stabbed with the novocain injection in the arm.  The scene was so clear in my mind of him running home and racing up the stairs as his arm waved and flapped behind him knocking over valuable objects and slapping him in the face.
That was me, hobbling/flopping around in complete and utter chaos.  I had lost all control of my four essential limbs, therefore driving walking, bending over and sitting down became dangerous activities (thank God I didn't run anyone over!).  Thankfully this excruciating pain only lasted the first week, but bear with me as I share this next story... Its pretty hilarious.

The Morning Of:
It really began to get interesting when I decided to wear a pair of open toed flats a friend had given me to work.  They looked really cute and matched my outfit.  I didn't bother checking to make sure they fit properly and quickly donned them on and skipped (or hobbled, but just work with me here) out the door.  When I arrived at school I was rather in a hurry to get into my classroom and get started preparing for the day.  I was in such a rush to enter my room that my shoes (which happened to be slippery and not a great match against tile flooring) slid down the hallway, sending me flying and landed me flat on my back.  Fortunately only a couple older students observed my tumble and graciously asked if I was alright.
After my embarrassing start to the morning, I commenced to crawl back to my feet, inch my way into my room and laugh for a good 30 seconds before pulling it together.

Later in the day...
My students had begun to notice my peculiar behavior and were inquiring as to why I was so slow.  Throughout the day, I was constantly asking students to help pick up crayons and markers from the floor, and for some reason it seemed the number of materials on the ground had multiplied making it impossible for me to ignore.  So apart from being driven crazy by my inability to ignore pencils, markers, crayons and glue hiding in all four corners of the classroom, I could not bring myself to sit and was constantly hobbling around from student to student checking work and answering questions.

In the late afternoon, about an hour before school was out, I had the students clean up and get ready for our topic study.  As the class was tidying up, I noticed a marker right by my foot.  Because I was tired of asking the kids to pick everything up, I decided to be brave and take the plunge.  As I descended down into an awkward squat in a feeble attempt to pick up the marker, one of my first grade boys turned to me and remarked "you look just like my mom, she can't pick anything up either!"  This made me laugh out loud.  You see, this boy's mom was 9 months pregnant and had a very valid reason for not bending over.  Me on the other hand, had no excuse and think next time around, I will just leave the marker on the floor.